All posts for the month November, 2011

The Daily Post: Write about the one that got away

Published November 28, 2011 by fallingintotheblack

Write about the one that got away.

I’m not sure if I would call him “the one that got away” so much as “the one with crappy timing”.

I met this guy right after my ex of many years and I split up.  At first, I wasn’t even attracted to him.  He was ok looking, but had kind of a messed up grill, and I’m a sucker for nice teeth.  Still, he was fun and funny and (uh oh!) in a band I liked.

I would go see his band play, and we became friends.  I started developing one of those unexplainable crushes on him, where you know you’re not even attracted to a person, yet you inexplicably want to be around them ALL THE TIME.  I would go to his work and hang out with him and the rest of his buddies.  I’d follow his band to out of town gigs.  Pretty soon, he and I became thick as thieves.  I’d crash at his place when we’d go out drinking and I was too intoxicated to drive home.  We’d meet up and arrive at parties and events together, to the point that we were always being asked if we were dating.  Sometimes, with me standing right there, he’d tell the person that we were.  I still don’t know why.

He always did this…he’d openly flirt with me in front of anyone and everyone, and he’d make it seem like we were an item.  He even let people think we had slept together.  He and I shared a bed many times, but never did anything more than make out a few times.

We were the best of friends, and people already thought we were dating, so I thought I should probably make a move on him.  I had it all planned out.  And then he introduced me to his new girlfriend.  I wanted to hate her, but she was a doll.  However, some of those rumors about us dating got back to her, and she started to become very suspicious of me.  I don’t blame her.  I probably would have if I were her, too.

Because she was suspicious, I did my best to keep my distance from him.  It was very hard.  He and I had so much fun together, and it was hard to plan a night out and not ask him to come with, or to plan a night in that didn’t involve watching movies on his couch.

Their relationship didn’t last, and they broke up right around the time I was getting ready to make a big change in my life.  Things were going quite badly for me, and I had made a decision to uproot myself and start over in a completely new city in a completely new state.  I had decided, that the only way I would stay would be if HE had asked me to stay.  He didn’t.  And I moved away.

He has a family now, and we’re still friends, but when we talk or when we hang out when I come back for a visit, the sexual and emotional tension is still there.  I often think “what if?”, but I also know that if he had begged me to stay, I would still be unhappy, even if he and I had finally ended up together.



About Me

Published November 28, 2011 by fallingintotheblack

Writing an “about me” post when you’re trying to be vague and anonymous is kind of silly, but I figured readers might want to know just why I’m here and why I’m being anonymous.

First of all, I’ve been blogging in some form or another since 1996. I’ve had friendships and relationships end or nearly end due to my blogs, because when I write, I tend to let it all out. I figured by being anonymous, I can let all that stuff that stays bottled inside me out, as long as it’s not actually attached to me or anyone else. All of those things that I wanted to put as my status updates on Facebook or post to message boards, but held back on…yeah, they’ll all go here now. 😉

So, some generalized demographic information about me: I’m female, and I live in a semi-large city in the southern United States, although I originally hail from the midwest. I’ve lived to see over 120 changes of seasons (go ahead…do the math). I identify as sexually bisexual, but tend to keep my actual relationships heterosexual. I am unmarried and childless, and I plan to stay that way on both counts. I have a near obsession with having my senses stimulated. I want to be surrounded by great smells. I want to constantly be around music. I love to be hugged and touched. I’m always taking in the visual beauty around me.

Currently, I’m in a relationship with a guy who is a few years younger than me, and we’re closing in on a year together. We’re exclusive, but not serious….we just enjoy our time together and are content with leaving it at that.

As a person, I’m pretty content, but I have my moments. I think my life is pretty much as good as it’s ever been, and things are mostly simple. As long as I keep things as simple as possible, I think I can continue to be happy.

Hopefully, you, dear reader, might get something out of this blog. Maybe I’ll teach you something. Maybe I’ll entertain you. Maybe you might see a little of your life in mine. At any rate, I hope it’s worth the read.